Clinic Cases
by BookwormKiwi
Summary: Solved in about 2 seconds by our very favourite Dr House


Clinic Cases…

Author: BookwormKiwi

Disclaimer: .:sigh:. I can dream

Summary: There's a new group of interns at PPTH, and House marvels at how they got hired at the hospital.

A/N: I had an idea, just for this one. I may not continue, but I hope I will. It's fun.

* * *

"Dr House?" Dr Shaw, a new intern, had stuck her head out of the clinic doors for a doctor and, unfortunately for her, it was House who had been limping past on the way to the bathroom.

"Dr Shaw," he said, acknowledging her with a nod.

"I need some help." She led him back to exam room 2, quickly telling him her problem.

"My patient's blue, and I don't know-"

"Depressed?" House asked. "Sad? Did the cat die?"

"No. She's, uh…her arm's blue."

House raised his eyebrows.

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"Dead sure." Dr Shaw looked worried. Her lips were clamped tightly together. She looked up at House in concern.

"Don't be," House said, upon entering the exam room.

"Hi, I'm Dr House," he said, speaking to the patient and her mother. "I'm here to help Dr Shaw, who is too incompetent to distinguish common colors."

"This is Lucy Stuarts," said Dr Shaw, looking from the patient, who was silently watching the arrival of a new doctor, to House himself who, with the aid of his cane, limped over to the teenage girl.

"Your arm."

Lucy held out her arm without a word. House could see she was struggling to keep her eyes open.

Rolling up her sleeve, House beckoned to Dr Shaw, but stopped when he saw that the skin was perfectly normal skin-colored, though perhaps slightly burnt.

"The blue one," he said forcefully. Lucy looked like she was going to speak, but her mother shushed her.

She sighed sulkily, though it made her cough, and she clutched her chest. She extended her left arm for House.

Taking no extra care, House shoved the sleeve out of the way, and jerked his head towards Lucy.

Dr Shaw stepped forward reluctantly.

"It's blue, Dr House," she sighed. She always wondered why he liked to play games with the interns. She knew that House knew exactly why her patient's skin was blue.

"That's where you're wrong, Dr Shaw," he said, deliberately addressing her more formally than necessary.

"If you look closer, you can see that her skin is, in fact, purple."

Dr Shaw looked at him impatiently. She had requested his help, and he was pointing out trivialities-

"Which means what, Dr Shaw?" House asked her. Although showing only the faintest flicker of a smile, Dr Shaw could tell her was enjoying himself.

"I…don't know," she said finally.

"You have pneumonia," he informed the two sitting on the bench, while rolling his eyes at Dr Shaw's lack of skill.

Lucy looked up at her mom in despair.

"It's treatable," House said, throwing a Vicodin pill into the back of his throat.

"Your most outstanding worry at the moment, however, is skin cancer."

Lucy and Mrs Stuart's expressions intensified dramatically.

"Dr House-" Shaw started, her voice much alarmed.

"Dr Shaw," he said, cutting her off. He turned to face Lucy. He took her right arm, and gestured to the band of freckles across her forearm.

"Any one of these could become cancerous."

A shocked silence descended upon them.

"What are you going to do next time you're in the sun…" House quickly checked the file Shaw was holding "…Lucy?

"I-I-I…" Lucy stammered.

"Three 'I's in one sentence," House commented. "That's rather egotistic of you."

House turned his back on Lucy's open mouth, realising he still need to go to the bathroom.

"Sunscreen. I know a good oncologist," House called over his shoulder, and left the room, closing the door loudly.

Dr Shaw smiled wanly at her patient.

"Sorry about that," she said weakly. "I have…some antibiotics for your…your pneumonia."

She didn't get any response, as Lucy and Mrs Stuarts were staring at the closed door, their eyes wide.

* * *

A/N: Argh, you wouldn't believe it. As soon as I finished the story, I found out that pneumonia can cause blue skin…let's just forget about that, shall we? 


End file.
